For the Kids or Us?

Anyway, I have two girls who are both very good athletes. They could be better than average at many things, and exceptional at two (which ones don’t matter). They are gifted athletically, but do not have the desire to be at the ultra competitive level of any sport. Its not in their make-up. When I asked them about this (as 14 and 16 yo) they explained that to be “elite” you not only have to devote your life to a sport (making sacrifices in other parts of your life) but you also have to be willing to crush the competition (often times your friends) and step over the bodies to get to the top. Since they do not see a future in sports beyond college, they both chose not to take this path.

Its different for boys/men in that there are more opportunities for play after college, and boys/men are also less concerned with hurting a friend’s feelings by being ultra competitive, but the sacrifice is still there.

I don’t have an answer for you other than to support choices, point out opportunities to challenge himself, and ask him what his thoughts are on the subject. As him every year at try-out time so he feels as if he is responsible for his choices.

People talk about helping their children to find their passion, as if being a success depends upon this. If we are honest with ourselves, how many of us have found our passion and have pursued it? How many of us have given up chunks of childhood and adulthood to pursue this passion?

Finding one’s passion and pursuing it to the nth degree its talked about on this forum is very rare indeed. Realizing that has helped me to keep things in perspective and be supportive of the choices my children are making.

Good luck and enjoy the ride.